Then what happened?

OK, so I said that wasn't the end. After Gabe changed, we went in to do some more clothes shopping at Kmart, remember I had already been in there once. This went off fairly well. Most everything we found fit. Gabe and Caleb would stand in the changing room and I would throw clothes in to them to try on. Sariah was a little more difficult. She's still tiny. but VERY particular about how things "feel". So it took her longer to find and try things. Spencer was bored. we had previously done shopping for him, so he was basically along for the ride, and to buy his gear for his welding class. Which, by the way, we found NONE of while there or at Walmart, so Spencer's presence is now that of an annoyed annoying teenager. Like a poky sliver in the bottom of your foot. So that's what his classification is for the rest of the story, the sliver. Now, he can't just bother me. He has to antagonize everyone, and so the energy of the trip has just gone from "we can get past the puke, " to "Are you kidding me?" And then at the check out line, it happened again, I spend money and get ill. I just don't like the feeling. and it wasn't over.
We finished Kmart and went and got lunch at Wendy's. I was skeptical, but Gabe said he really was fine, so whatever. Then we headed across the street to Walmart and shopped there. We had to get a lot of nonfood things, TP, PT, laundry stuff, et cetera. And we found Sariah another pair of jeans that needed to be tried on. I've learned my lesson, she must choose her own stuff now, and try everything on. After all that and a couple trips to the bathroom, for everyone, we headed to the food section to take care of the main reason we were there. After a few minutes of grabbing things that we needed, I realized that I needed to go to the bathroom. Here is why...I hadn't been paying close enough attention to the *time of month* and so when you feel that familiar...Oh crap, things need to be attended to. So here I am in the bathroom at Walmart with no purse, no coins, no feminine hygiene things. What choices do I have? Toilet paper. I don't think I need to go into anymore detail about this. I went out with a quasi positive mood that I would be able to finish shopping. When I got out to where I left the kids, they were fighting about what 100 calorie cookie packs they wanted for their lunches. Sorry, those cute little packages might be nice when you live alone, but trying to feed 7 kids lunch everyday? they just aren't economical. That was the last silly little straw. Plus I needed to go to other side of the store to pick up some *girl* stuff. This confused everyone. So While they waited I also bought some bubble bath, so I didn't have to have the *talk* with my 4 oldest children on the way home. After we checked out, spending more money than I have at Walmart, (other than buying our TV) since Christmas, I mentioned to Spencer that I needed to go back to the restroom. "But, you just went?!" said the sliver. (Bite me,) I'll be right back. We loaded up the puked on Suburban and drove home. But that's not all...there is still what happened at home... and on Sunday.

Something to blog about

So I have learned when ordinary mundane tasks take a twist to the difficult, do to whatever circumstances, good stories are born and there is finally something to blog about. I have said and I quote myself... Good art comes from weak hearts. This applies to all sorts of things. It just adds to the idea of *opposition in all things*... makes everything a lot funnier. So here we go with my two days direct from the funnier side of Hell.
It all started when Caleb, the new 1st grader, walked out of his room dressed for the first day of school. His jeans were too short and there were little holes in both knees. And then when Sariah, the new 5th grader, came out dressed for the 2nd day of school in the same pair of ratty jeans she wore the first day. She complained that "nothing fits" when told to go change (because she looked like a hobo.) I don't have anything, in particular, against hobo's. As long as my children don't accept their *forced* sense of fashion for their own. I came quickly to the conclusion that my children needed new clothes. This required a trip to the nearest Walmart. Which happens to be in Riverton, a nice hour and 20 minute jaunt down the highway. The soonest this could happen was Saturday. I asked my friend to keep the 3 youngest kids. While I understand the insanity of taking any children shopping wherever there are fluorescent lights involved (I'm telling you there is a connection in crazy behavior in children and the lighting in the stores), I am not stupid enough to shove them all in a hot car (the AC isn't working quite right) and then shop with them for clothes, let alone food. We are attempting the cold lunch approach this year. So we needed to get groceries at a cheaper location, which is NOWHERE in this town. So our Saturday started out with the goal of accomplishing two things, buy clothes, so they're not naked. And buy food so the lunches don't totally suck.
In the car on the way we listened to "Eclipse" the 3rd book in the Twilight series. Interesting, I'm not sure still how I feel about these books, but that's another post altogether. I sped a little which I rarely if ever do. The most I go is 5 over the speed limit. But even that much with windy mountain roads can make a warm car ride even bumpier or more sway-ier, add WY wind and you get the PERFECT ingredients for car sickness. I should know, I used to puke on every car trip, just ask my sister. Everything was fine until we were maybe 5 miles outside Riverton, if that. Gabriel says from the middle seat, "I think I'm going to be sick." I wasn't quite sure how to process this information. I had dealt with Sariah saying that most of the trip just so she could have her window down. So I suggested that he move over to the window and get some air. I would have pulled over but we had been stuck between two trucks for a while and there was no real place to do it. I yelled for Spencer to find a trash bag, we had nothing in the car. Come on, we always have some sort of trash bag in the car, we have melted crayons... and an old cheeseburger, why not a stupid trash bag. I looked back at Gabe in hopes that he could understand that we were super close and if he could just hold... oh never mind. By the time I had even registered anything, he had already puked out the window. Now in the land where the *handbook to life* is handed out when you're born, you get to learn directly from its pages making some of life's experiences easier. But since we don't live there, we have to learn some things by trial and oops. For example, in the *handbook to life* under the chapter titled "Things NOT to do" you would find suggestions such as; "Pee on a flat rock" or "Teach your baby sister to bite" or "Puke out the window, going 65mph... into the wind." Gabriel got to learn this one on his own.
After I realized that it had already happened we pulled into the Kmart parking lot, (It was across the street from Walmart. (I thought it might be a nice change for clothes shopping.) to asses full damages. Gabe had tried to get most of the puke off his face using the half dried baby wipes that were in the car. I looked at his shirt trying to decide if we could get away with taking him inside. Oh, I didn't mention the chocolate cream pie that he had for breakfast. Right do the visual math. Anyway the decision was made that I needed to go buy him some new clothes and have him change. I got out and then saw the side of the vehicle. All I could do was laugh and think about the truck driving behind us, it had to have gotten hit. (that's mean, I know) I went in the store, found him a Tshirt and pair of shorts and some wet baby wipes. Then went back out. While he changed, I tried to wipe down the side of the suburban with the baby wipes. So instead of chocolate vomit splattered, I mean SPLATTERED all across the truck, we now had whitish smeary chocolate puke swirls all across the truck. And this was NOT all that day. but that is all I have time to type right now. Spencer starts seminary tomorrow morning and that means I have to get up early so I can make sure he catches his ride. but I will continue tomorrow with the rest of what happened, because that was all before noon. Oh and then there was today...

I take it all back. Well not the lamentation of Spencer being in H.S. but apparently he did fairly well today...but girls talked to him...I leave that alone for now. It WAS quieter. In my head it was a LOT quieter. I only had to think for 4 people today, instead of 8. And one of those 4 doesn't even really talk yet, and she took a nap. I did laundry ALL day. which is insane because my husband had it mostly caught up before he left. "Laundry is my friend, laundry is my friend," I keep trying, but it's not working. but, When I get to those stupid white socks...arrgh. When Jason comes home the *sock box* goes out the window. So I thought I would match them up fold them. poke my eyes out. It really wasn't too bad. I need to finish the kitchen. We started a remodel quite a while ago. It really started rolling 6 weeks ago. We just tiled our counters. I have to seal the grout, add the back splash, paint and put everything back together. It's a pain in the tuckus (how do you spell that, is it really a word?it is google is a wonderful thing. alternate spelling to the yiddish word *tuches*) to function around a *nonfunctional* kitchen. I saw one episode of that "Jon & Kate+8" show where they were redoing a perfectly good kitchen. I couldn't believe the whining. "This doesn't work because of blah, blah, blah, poor me wah" I couldn't believe it. I couldn't stand it. Maybe the show was deserving of air time when the kids were littler, it may have been neat to see two people working together to raise all those babies. But did they do it alone? I never watched it. but if you have nanny's and nurses, I think you lose a lot of the "WOW" factor. and then add money, plastic surgery, fame and lameness, I think the show should go away and these "normal" people should learn what real life is all about. And on that strange tangent...I will say no more about something that does not deserve my attention. I now need to focus on my seven, one of which is talking endlessly to me, about? I don't know what. and one that is screaming "MOMMY" because he needs his hiney wiped. The *poop ninja* is on duty. And so I will leave you with that weird post to do with as you will.
good day to ya

I never thought that getting child #1 ready for the first day of high school would cause such mental anguish. It's worse than sending one to Kindergarten. With Kindergarten, there is a sense of accomplishment, a sense of "Wow, look at us...one more through the door. And they're potty trained!" But with a high-schooler, it's more like "Aww hell...there goes the last chance for his poor innocent brain." Oh, and the torment and concern for the effect that *other peoples* children may have on them. So we pray, and learn another little lesson from God. Lessons that you can only learn as a parent. I've gotten a lot of those.
So tomorrow is the first day of school. Early, I know. And I'm torn, in general, about the whole thing. Some may say it's good to have the kids in school, it makes life at home easier. I'm not sure about that. I still have 5,6 & 7 at home. I can't peacefully leave the house till 1-4 are home. Maybe I'll get more *home-work* accomplished...wish me luck with that one. We'll have to see how it all goes tomorrow. Why the heck would anyone start school on a Thursday? Why not wait until Monday? Are they trying to ease us into a full week? Giving us a sample of how it's going to be to get 4 (not always cheerful and compliant) kids up and ready for school while either praying that the other 3 stay sleeping (fat chance) so they don't bawl about it not being their turn to go to school.
Actually I think all will run swimmingly. I wish that my husband could have gone to work the day after the first day of school and not the day prior. Ah well. No matter.

so all I have to say in remembrance of tradition in this family is..."First Day of School, First Day of School, BOOGER." that's really a funny story, but you'd have to know Gabriel to find its true humor
Good day to ya.